Musings

June 23, 2011

The upside of my long bus/boat/plane rides is that they give me time to reflect on these last 9 ½ months. I consider these months a gift to myself and it’s been terrific. I feel so fortunate to have been able to do it and also so grateful for the support of my family and friends who encouraged me to take the leap. I have no regrets. I have had so many amazing, fun, interesting and inspiring experiences. Some really stood out as the most wonderful so in the spirit of my Type A side, I organized my top moments.

The Journey’s Highlights

(In no particular order, that would be impossible to figure!)

A SALUTE TO NATURE

1. 1. Borneo Riverboat Trip Seeing Orangutans, Indonesia

2. 2. Scuba Diving off Nusa Lembogan, Indonesia

3. 3. Basking in the Solitude of the Togean Islands, Indonesia

4. 4. Muang Ngoi Area and the Accompanying Boat Trips, Laos*

5. 5. Ngorongoro Safari, Tanzania

6. 6. Bengal Tiger Sighting, India

7. 7. Thrilling Elephant Ride, Thailand

8. 8. Riverboat Ride from Mawlamyine to Hpa-an, Myanmar

9. 9. Day on a Sailboat off Cesme, Turkey

10. Mountains of Kashmir, India

*Could definitely go in the next category too!!!

KNOCK ME OFF MY FEET Historical and Cultural Experiences

1. 1. Day with Burmese friend in Mawlamyine, Myanmar

2. 2.. Ellora and Ajanta Caves, India

3. 3. Bat Hunting Day, Indonesia

4. 4. Kalimantan Canal Tours (Floating Market & Riverside Homes), Indonesia

5. 5. Bagan, Myanmar

6. 6. Bicycling Angkor Wat and Outlying Ruins, Cambodia

7. 7. Nguyen Royal Tombs, Vietnam

8. 8. Wat Phra Kaew & The Grand Palace, Thailand

9. 9. Golden Rock, Myanmar

10. Rajasthani Forts and Palaces, India (Is it cheating to collapse these into one? =P)

11. Taj Mahal, India

(Forgive me; keeping it to 11 was hard enough!)

TREATS & PAMPERINGS AT THEIR BEST

1. 1. Sihanoukville Beach, Cambodia

2. 2. Visits by Mom and Tania

3. 3. Decompressing in Singapore with Friends

4. 4. Silent Meditation Retreat, India

5. 5. SpaLand, South Korea

6. 6. Turkish Bath, Turkey

7. 7. Taj Residency Hotel, India

8. 8. Indian Food

9. 9. Wonderful People Met Along the Way

10. Zanzibar Beach, Tanzania

I started out this journey a bit afraid of the unknown and the risks (abroad and at home I was taking), but I came to lose that fear. I realized that the journey wasn’t as scary as I imagined and even the countries I feared the most in terms of safety and robbery, India and Tanzania, were not nearly as intimidating as I had imagined. At times they were challenging and certain areas were to be avoided, but my mind had blown out of proportion how scary they were. Loneliness was another worry I had. Never had I been away from family and friends for so long – and in unfamiliar places. Surprisingly, I was rarely lonely. I enjoyed the solitude and even chose it over socializing at times. And I was always meeting locals and tourists who kept me from being lonely. Traveling with someone has its bonuses, but traveling alone does too. I not only learned more about myself, but I also met so many more people, especially locals, because I was alone.

I have also been extremely lucky to have avoided major problems, like serious illness, injury, muggings, bed bugs, etc. I only had to take my Cipro once! I know an illness could rear its head after I get back, but I’m crossing my fingers and hoping I don’t jinx myself by writing that I’ve been so fortunate with my health. I avoided writing much before because I figured I would jinx it. In SE Asia I told one woman how fortunate I had been and the next day I had stomach issues – the next day! Also, once I started riding on the buses in Indonesia I figured it would be inevitable I would be in a bus crash on the trip. It was just a matter of how serious it would be. I was cautious when driving a motor bike and was careful about who I rode with and where, but I still feel incredibly lucky to have avoided an accident. I saw and heard of so many tourists with serious leg burns from the exhaust pipe or worse. I did have bugs in beds, but I thankfully avoided bed bugs! Not sure how I escaped them, but what a hassle I avoided.

Traveling this long on my own on a shoestring budget in developing countries had its challenges and I feel good that I rose to the challenge. I think again it’s just becoming familiar with how to travel and take care of one’s self. It also helped to get over the hurdle of the pre-trip jitters and recognize that my imagination was blowing things out of proportion. I also would get a bit nervous when I hit a new country, but again I tried to realize things would work out and I’d “learn the ropes.” This trip has really helped me just let things unfold and have confidence they will work out. I’ve been able to release more worry and anxiety as the trip progressed. We’ll see how well I maintain this attitude when I’m in my old stomping grounds of the USA and looking for work! There are times I get really frustrated, especially with the touts, but I’ve also noticed it doesn’t happen as often as it did before. Expectations also make a big difference with frustration and my expectations of service, efficiency, etc. are different in the developing world. So I’ve been more patient and unfazed when my hotels are disorganized, we get a flat tire, etc. I had my moments though. I hope I can maintain these reactions. I definitely feel better when I’m not worrying, frustrated or anxious!

Several people have commented how happy I look in the blog pictures. I feel happy and friendlier. Feeling good and happy has made me friendlier in my moment to moment interactions. Being away from NYC and in more hospitable environments has also helped.

The months have chipped away at the cold exterior New Yorkers often get. It feels so good to smile at strangers and strike up conversations. This is more like the environment I grew up in in Oklahoma and most of the US has a friendly attitude towards strangers. NY is an anomaly and I didn’t like growing that cold shoulder to strangers. In New York City you are not supposed to make eye contact on the street with strangers let alone smile at them! And interactions in restaurants and stores are generally gruff and brief. There are exceptions and they make your day. The odd thing is that New Yorkers are friendly and helpful when need be. If you are lugging a baby stroller or luggage someone always offers to help. If you are lost and manage to get the attention of someone on the street they will help you.

The trip has changed me and maybe in some ways I’m not aware of yet, but I am glad for the changes and hope they stay a part of me. I’m not only much more patient, but am also more interested in having time alone with my own thoughts. I have really valued the time to think about various matters and come to some realizations about myself and others. One realization is that I no longer feel a massive urge to live overseas. If something amazing came along I might take it, but it’s no longer a priority. And it’s not that I don’t love being overseas, but I would like to stay closer to my friends and family now. With my increased patience and a little more self-realization I feel calmer and more content. The meditation retreat pushed me along with this.

I have also learned that I don’t mind wearing the same four outfits for 9 ½ months. :) It wasn’t such a big deal. I also haven’t missed a lot of my “things” back home. It’s amazing how attached I felt to so many of my things and I haven’t missed most of them. I’m sure I’ll enjoy all my “stuff” when I get it out of storage, but I’m hoping I also find I can get rid of more of it. I must admit I have missed my nice sunglasses and jewelry though :) I wasn’t surrounded by such materialism on my trip and it will be more of a challenge her to stay detached and uninterested.

The travels have been quite revealing in terms of perceptions of teachers. In the US I often get a patronizing response to saying I teach. Often the look in the eye says, how nice you’re doing some good, but it’s not really important or respectable – and you don’t make money. We hear people say we are overpaid and don’t work hard. Through policies and actions the local and federal governments show they either disdain teachers (especially Bloomberg) or only give lip service to aiding the profession and the education of upcoming generations. We have the disrespectful saying, “If you can’t do, teach.” Generally, only those who have teachers in the family or are close friends with a teacher have any concept of how hard we work, the great challenges we face in and out of the classroom and what the job entails.

I won’t write an essay proving how hard most teachers work or go on about how ridiculously and insultingly low our pay is (I see it as charity work), but rather I’ll show perspectives overseas. The immediate respect I received from locals in the countries I visited was shocking at first. I wasn’t used to it. I had people thanking me and praising the profession. I even had people ask to shake my hand! In Indonesia being a teacher was seen as the top profession alongside being a lawyer. Being a teacher gives someone status in these countries, even if the pay is low. Talking with travelers from other developed countries, I gathered that American teachers are probably the lowest paid in terms of salary vs. buying power and standard of living. Teachers in these countries didn’t seem to need to do additional jobs after school or during summer break in order to live alone or support a family.

My view of people and the world has shifted a bit too. We tend to define the world through our own lens and it’s easy to see the “truth” of our world as the ultimate truth and superior way. And it is hard, even when we logically know this is false, to really feel the falsehood. For instance, I wrote before about how certain cultural practices I encountered really challenged my reflex to think “my way, my culture’s way” is better. I have worked really hard to be conscious of how biases my view is. I also witnessed this phenomenon in other cultures and people. I’ve always found it astounding that one group of people might fight against the prejudice they’ve experience, but then are not able to use that experience to see how they might be prejudice of others. It takes reflection and a fight with yourself to see how stereotypes and hatreds are bred from our own ignorance and an unwillingness to see humanity in others. I see this in America and I saw it in countries I visited, whether it had to do with race, nationality, class, religion, sexuality or sex. We all have our prejudices, but I want to actively confront mine and not let the seeming ease of the judgments win. Sorry if I sound preachy!!!

Part of what helps me break down my prejudices is witnessing throughout this trip how we are all alike. Around the world people share a basic humanity. We have similar desires, worries and goodness. My trip would have been an utter disaster if it wasn’t for the goodness of humanity. The desire to be loved and love is universal as is the aim to be happy. Children like the same games and can lift any spirit with their smiles.

The truth of the phrase “everything is relative” proved so true on this trip. The questions, what is valued, who is considered wealthy, what is clean, what is a short trip versus a long trip, etc., all have many answers. For instance, I was thinking how short my time in Tanzania was, two weeks. But that is in relation to a larger trip rather than the typical vacation I might have. Depending on travelers I talk to taking a year to travel might be a “normal” and for others unusual. In most of these countries I was assumed to be rich because I was white, American and a tourist. Comparatively, there is truth to this, but the flip side is that I risked financial security to travel and am in the red. So in actuality many of the touts trying to get business from “this rich woman” probably have more money at the moment. However, I have the tools, support and opportunity to get back on my feet and I am confident everything will work out. I don’t see struggling day by day for the rest of my life, like many people I saw. Who knows what the future holds – maybe I will. And of course, my comparison to other Americans presents a whole different answer to my so called wealth. Perspective plays into everything.

The trip demonstrated firsthand how globalized our world is. The level of exchange of clothes, music, ideas, goods, and technology is huge. For some of these items the exchange is more one-sided, going west to east, but it is strong and it is still a two-way street. Global warming is proving out interconnected we are. Most places I visited have been experiencing highly unusual weather and of course the news has shown the growing frequency and strength of natural disasters. The factories and cars in developing world might have emitted more carbon dioxide than the modernized nations, but the overall amount is still coming from us.

Though I still see faults with certain aspects our country, culturally and politically, I also have a deeper appreciation for what does work here. Corruption isn’t as crippling here as in the countries I visited. Education and opportunities are available. Being from the lower makes it more difficult to achieve and those challenges need to be addressed, but just having universal education through high school is wonderful. We see it as a right, and it should be, but most in the world don’t get much.

America’s reputation overseas is improving a little bit. Bush just destroyed it. Obama’s election helped immensely and many people would say his name after hearing I was from the US.

I came to realize a certain trait in America is unique. Anyone can become an American. In general Americans accept, as well as people overseas, that immigrants and children of immigrants can become American. The line at which you become American might be drawn differently, but the idea is there. I think this is a wonderful attribute of ours. Sadly, there are anti-foreigners and people will distinguish between documented and undocumented immigrants, but somewhere in this muddle there is an acceptance of foreigners and once outsiders becoming American. Our long history of immigration and diversity of population and created this culture. Some other western nations also share this trait it seems. In contrast, the countries I visited rarely would have this view. I could live in the country and raise a family with no intention of leaving, but I would still always be an outsider. My children would be outsiders. I would never be considered Indian, Korean, Vietnamese, etc. Even people from outside those countries likely wouldn’t accept me as being India, Korean or Vietnamese.

I also came to have a deeper understanding of how crippling corruption is for developing countries. It seems like really the major obstacle in improving the lives of the people. You see the resilience of people and the general willingness of people to accept their lot. People might complain and make some protests, but few are willing to risk their lives when basic needs are met. I’m sure most feel powerless. For better or worse this seems to be our nature. It’s not always the case, but from the horrid government of Myanmar to the corruption throughout the developing world, people aren’t rising up. And looking back in history, revolt usually occurs when basic needs are unfulfilled. Famine and massive economic downturns are frequently triggers. We did Arab Spring, but again I believe the massive economic downturn was the trigger because people were really concerned about their basic welfare. And then the momentum and sense of empowerment caught on.

June 28, 2011

Amazing how things change with one plane ride. I am on another bus. This one is between Washington, DC and New York City. The road is wide and smooth and I’m in comfy chairs. Though I think what communicates the best the shocking contrast between this and my earlier rides overseas is that I have WiFi and power plugs.

I’ve had a couple of nice days with friends in DC and have enjoyed American sweets and Mexican food. I have also been quite a couch potato. I did break away from the TV to make dinner for friends.

As I walk and drive around everything is so new, clean, ordered, and rich looking. And on the street people rush about. Technology is also much more in your face. We’ll see how I do in NYC!